I’m feeling suicidal

I don’t know what to do. I already tried slitting my wrists. It’s painful that I don’t want to live. It’s Easter to top it off too. It’s not even an April Fools joke either. I wish I had medical marijuana it always helps when I feel like this. I spoke with Mike the DV Farm owner, he said it’s normal to feel like this because I really haven’t found where I fit in around here, and that I’m still new to the farm. I wish I had a girlfriend one that wouldn’t care what I’m going through, one that would give me words of encouragement, one that would not leave me when times get tough.  I’m going through a tough time now, just a little shout out to miss beautiful out there, if your out there. I’m trying my best, I took Tank our house dog for a walk, he’s a 5 month black lab collie mix, I got him to lye down with out a treat. He’s a good dog. I don’t know why I have to feel like this even after all the times I spent in the hospital and even after all the medications, why me. Like my First Sergeant once trained us on Resiliency, I must remain resilient and carry on no matter how tough it gets. Please inquire about T-shirts put me to work. The boredom at the farm is a killer literally.

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